Rollercoastin'

One of my homework assignments for teacher training this week was to write about our spiritual rollercoaster. I remember as soon as we were told this assignment, my classmate, L, let out his signature "WOAH" sound. And wow, was that response relative for the journey I was about to share with my classmates.

Thinking about my past with my spirituality, I have had many ups and downs. Right now I am on the high, but truly afraid of what I will find once I reach the top.

In high school, I was a part of a beautiful youth group that helped me accept my adolescent years. After graduating college, I helped lead the same youth group for many years and attended and helped lead religious retreats. It was as soon as I moved into the city, that I discovered my yoga practice, I began to let go of the religion I was raised on. I tried to find a connection with the Catholic church again, but losing my grandfather, my ultimate teacher, pushed me away from the church, rather then take me in. I felt hurt and abandoned.
In grieving this death, I began to roll my mat out everyday, and have my own personal moving prayer with God as I danced through these shapes and poses. I have had more eye-opening experiences with the divine during meditation or in pigeon pose, then I have ever had in a church. I have opened my body in so many ways that I have found my personal freedom. Opportunities are extended my way, because my body and mind are open and embracing all. I float around in a constant blissful state. I have found the benefits of meditating for 30 minutes every morning at sunrise. I bow to Buddha. Shiva is my OMboy. Ganesh is the reason I am the woman I am today. With all of this learned, I am finding enlightenment.

A few months ago, I came across this interview with my teacher, Dana Flynn. There is a part in here that shook me. That made me cry. That made me realize - I am not the only one who finds God outside of the church. Dana talks about God in a way that makes God more like a friend, then a holy figure. Something I truly admire, and something I hope to achieve, as right now, I still am intimidated by this spirit who gave me a life the included so many hard lessons.



I urge you all to take a few moments and watch this video, watch these movements, and think about your own personal connection with the divine. Who do you bow to? Who is your guru? What is your daily prayer? What has your spiritual rollercoaster looked like? Where do you find God?

Shanti -
M